I need you to understand there is a sorrow that occurs at times as we walk with the Lord. A sorrow when others turn from the truth. A sorrow when a brother or sister wounds you on the journey. A sorrow, and sometimes heaviness, that comes when God asks you to do something contrary to the understanding of man. A sorrow that comes when God does not allow you to defend yourself yet asks you to remain silent and let Him battle for you. A sorrow when you missed a chance to share Him with someone whose life on earth just ended. A weariness that comes from the battle between good and evil. A longing for rest sometimes as God nudges you to keep moving..rest will have to wait. A fatigue that can be overwhelming even to the most faithful servant. A discouragement that comes when you know God gave you a vision and years later it is yet to be fulfilled. I read much about this with some of the most faithful evangelist throughout the centuries who also experienced times of great distress.
Let’s face it, if we are honest about this, and we truly are living out our faith in Jesus…the journey can be quite difficult and full of despair! As I was in this season of my life God showed me a passage of scripture in Ephesians 6:20 where Paul describes himself as an ‘ambassador in chains.”
Ephesians 6:19-20 “and pray on my behalf, that utterance may be given to me in the opening of my
mouth, to make known with boldness the mystery of the gospel, for which I am an ambassador in chains; that in proclaiming it I may speak boldly, as I ought to speak.”
I get this!! FREEDOM is always found in His WORD! We AREN’T CRAZY! Paul felt the same way! Don’t you also remember David and the Psalms as he poured out his anguish of heart before God! Truly, on the days when you think it’s time to throw in the towel, this is just too hard, I cannot do this anymore! I’ve given the good fight, It’s time to turn back. Let me tell you there is NO TURNING BACK! It would not be worth it. Go to the secret place and hear Him say what He said to me. “I cannot let you go Shelly..you are mine! I need you to go tell others and fulfill your calling!” I could bawl my eyes out writing this because truthfully I can’t live without Him! He is my LIFE! My LOVE! My King! My heart belongs to Him and I would miss Him so should I turn back! Be encouraged He is so deeply in love with YOU! He will pursue you passionately and not let go! Thank you Jesus! If you are walking in the things of God think it not strange my friend of these sinking feelings. There is a very REAL Battle taking place all around us! Remain under His wings, stay in His presence! A Valley leads to a mountaintop! Learn in the journey! Be faithful…even when you think you have nothing left to give! HE WILL SUSTAIN YOU! Don’t condemn yourself, He knows we are but humans! We NEED HIM! With Him ALL THINGS ARE POSSIBLE! The truth is “Apart from Him, we CAN DO NOTHING!” including walking victoriously our journey with Him! He is the Journey!
Bound by Grace
(©Shelly Wilson Music, Sesac)
As you write my story
Would you include
A time of rest….
Today my mind is tired
Of all this loneliness
When you send me down the road
To set another free
Please…don’t forget me.
And my own sea of unbelief.
Some days I’m barely holding on
But only by a thread
trying to obey
All of your requests
yet now I understand why Paul was bound in chains
Not because of any man
For he was simply bound by grace.
And as you watch me sleep
Will your feathers cover me?
From the taunting that’s hovering?
And would you break into the clouds
Where darkness is daunting
And shine through with a smile
To wash away the haunting?
Some days I’m barely holding on
But only by a thread
trying to obey
All of your requests
yet now I understand why Paul was bound in chains
Not because of any man
For he was simply bound by grace.
And in my darkest hour
When I’m ready to give in
When I long for normalcy
And the praise of men
The thought of living without you
is unbearable to me
there can be no turning back
you whisper in the wind
So slowly I get up
With sorrow and with pain
With a glance you nod your head
And pour out peace like rain.
I know you’re barely holding on
You’re hanging by a thread
Trying to obey
All of my requests
So now you understand that Paul was bound in chains
He wasn’t bound by any man
But he was bound by my grace.
Love MUCH!,
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